Prince Max
by Ciamil B
Summary: Everyone wants Prince Max, and Max is fed up. He goes to the forests to live his days out as a hermit, but he never counted on meeting meeting a band of gypsies or boy named Tyson. Slight x-over with Hetalia. TysonxMax, other pairings inside. SLASH!


Prince Max  
By: Ciamil B.  
Pairing: Tyson x Max (side: Bryan x Rei, Tala x Mystel, and other to be added)  
Warnings: Slash, guy on guy. Stuff like that.  
Summary: Everyone wants Prince Max, and Prince Max is fed up with it. He goes to the forest instead to live his days out as a hermit, but he never counted on meeting the band of gypsies that just happened to be living in it. So he meets Tyson.

* * *

Once upon a time, there was a young prince who lived in a palace, and even the Gods themselves looked upon him thinking, "I'd totally tap that." His life was plagued with numerous marriage proposals and other proposals of the less-than-innocent kind from males and females, the former of which he could never seem to get away from.

His parents gasped, and they cried, and they wept, but nothing they did ever stopped the damn pheromones that came from their son. So, in a last ditch attempt to preserve their son's virginity and chastity, they sent him off into the woods so that he could live alone – untouched and unharmed.

Sadly, two days after they did so, a whole community of settlers also moved into the forest, preparing to call it their 'home.' Thus, in reality, they did not send their son to a better place, but instead opened him to greater danger. It was also particularly sad that they did not send  
bodyguards, either, because they were afraid that the bodyguard himself would do something less-than-innocent to their son.

The boy's name was Max Tate, and this is his story about how he evaded countless suitors and suitresses, and eventually found himself a true love who stayed with him forever and ever and ever.

* * *

"Your Highness, they did it again!" A maid ran down the halls of the palace, knocking over a vase that had the King's face painted on it. She didn't mind, and the Queen didn't either, because more important things were at stake.

"Again? You mean those poofy suitors that have set their eyes on my son? How uncouth! Mary, take this to Max at once and tell him to get rid of those men as soon as possible!" The Queen handed Mary a bottle of what could have been pepper spray, but since pepper spray did not exist back then, it was called its alternative name, "The Super-Special Keep-Men-Away Perfume," which was part cattle dung, part kitten pee, and part remains of the Chief Cook's failed recipes. It was very potent, to say the least.

"Yes, Your Highness!" Mary was breathless when she ran back to serve her young master. Max was always getting into these situations, Mary thought. It was getting repetitive, and the men never learned!

"Hey, Baby, just get down here! I swear I'll treat you right!"

"You treat him right? Yeah right! Baby, I'll treat you even better than he ever can!"

"You two both shut up! None of you will be as good to him as I will. Max, just jump down! I'll catch you and whisk you away into my chambers!"

"Holy shit, I can't deal with this right now! I have a Latin quiz in two minutes!" A young man with golden hair (frequently described as 'sunshine hair' by many men), blue eyes ('glistening sapphires'), tanned skin ('caramel goodness'), and a unhappy frown ( 'seductive and come hither') recoiled in his chair.

His room was filled with underwear that was thrown into his window, roses that were likewise given, and many other objects that he really did not feel comfortable discussing.

"Young master! I have the solution to your problems!" Mary ran into her master's room, one hand holding the smelly bottle, the other hand covering her nose.

"Ah yes, I had just run out. Thank you, Mary. Do you mind dumping it onto them?" Max said, gesturing to the large crowd outside that was still growing. The hand that was gesturing to the window was quickly withdrawn to dodge a rogue piece of underwear.

"We should probably boil everything in your room later," Mary muttered, moving over to the window. "Well, bombs away!"

"Oh God! It smells!"

"Not again!"

"Although my pleasant smell has faded, my love for you will never, Max Tate! I will see you again tomorrow!"

"I'll always love you, Max!"

"My bed is always welcome to you!"

Max groaned and shut his Latin book with a slam. Latin could wait. What he really needed now was to go bang his head against the wall to forget the horrors of his young life.

* * *

"This situation has become unbearable!" The queen loudly exclaimed to her husband one day when they were alone in their chambers, doing what every couple did when they had some rare free time from their children and duties. The curtains were closed, the doors were locked, and the queen and the king sat on their bed.

"King me!" Her husband exclaimed, moving his red piece to her side. "What did you say? Oh yes, this situation has become entirely unbearable. Mary says that our son has been losing weight because of this mess," he said, finger taping his latest piece.

"I know! He has become so thin and unhealthy already," the queen said, moving the checkerboard to the side. "What should we do, beloved husband?"

"I don't know. We can't possibly let him stay in his room forever like he is doing, but he can barely go outside at all without being mobbed! And all the guards absolutely refuse to shoot anyone who comes near Max… and we may not use military means because people would become discontent with us!"

"Oh dear, we are in a pickle. A pickle, a pickle, a pickle," the queen said. They sat in silence for a while, before the king suddenly brightened.

"I've got it!" He exclaimed loudly, springing up from his place on their bed and walking over to a random desk. He rummaged through the drawers until he got a hold of a map.

"Look here! Arthur was over last month, and he told me of a quiet, lovely place in the woods that he liked to go to for fishing!" He pointed at a random large forest not far from the palace. "No one ever goes there, Arthur says. We can send Max there and let Arthur be his company!"

The queen nodded approvingly. Everyone knew that Arthur was practically tied down and loaded with weights by Sir Alfred from a neighboring kingdom. Rumors had it that Arthur and Alfred had been in love since their early childhood, and neither of them had ever so much as looked at another person in their entire lives.

"But dear," the queen started, a thought coming to her, "what about us? We cannot see our own son?"

The king nodded sadly. "I'm afraid that is a sacrifice we must make for our son's virginity. No matter, though! Arthur gave me this last month, too," the king said, pulling out a security camera that totally did not belong in the timeline. "We can see Max from this, and Max can talk to us through this!"

"This is a lovely plan, husband! Quick, let us go and tell Max immediately!"

There were initially concerns over Max's safety, as well as his mental and physical health as a result of being isolated and socially separated, but Max himself sealed his fate when he wholeheartedly agreed with the plan. Max by nature did not like being secluded, but his many years of encountering suitors and suitresses who wanted to get into his pants made him jump at the idea of living alone in the forest.

"I'm sick and tired of being sexually harassed! If I have to smell another piece of underwear again, I'm going to kill myself!" He said passionately when those who moderately wanted to get into his pants asked him why he wanted to leave.

So it was decided that in two weeks, young prince Max would be moved to a secluded patch of woodland so that he could live a peaceful life, educated by Sir Arthur Kirkland.

After two weeks had passed, Max gathered all of his prized possessions and textbooks, and moved to a little log cabin in the woods. The farewell party was small and intimate, with both the queen and the king crying at the sight of their son leaving the palace.

Sir Arthur Kirkland recalled the journey to the forest as possibly one of the most dangerous journeys he had ever made.

"This is bloody insane! Not even Alfred has ever dragged me onto such a bloody quest! God, men jumping at us left and right! It's a horrible, horrible experience," Arthur was heard muttering to himself (or so it seemed) when he punched a random suitor out of the way of him and Max.

Eventually, Arthur was able to use those he called his 'friends' to escape the random suitors that kept on harassing Max.

"Who the hell kicked me! Was it you?"

"No! I didn't kick you!"

"But you're right behind me!"

"I swear I didn't do it!"

Arthur gave a thumbs up to his friend. His friend stomped his hooves on the ground and ran away, his horn swiping at suitors as he ran off.

'Unicorns are lovely,' Arthur thought to himself as he opened the door to the cottage. A legion of men speckled the trail from the castle to the cottage, leaving a huge 'follow the bird seeds' type of thing to Max. Arthur supposed he was going to have to call some of his other, less friendly 'friends' in to clean up the mess.

"Alright, this is your new home," Arthur said, ushering Max inside of the small cottage. It was plain and bare, with many bookshelves. Max could practically feel the dust setting inside of his stomach. He knew the under normal circumstances, even the meanest of creatures would scoff at this house, but he wasn't in normal circumstances.

"Well, home sweet home," he muttered to himself, placing his bookbag onto a table that promptly collapsed. Just then, bats flew out of the chimney and clawed at his face.

Somehow, Max thought living here was going to be a lot harder than he imagined.

= End Chapter 1 =

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A/N: Tell me what you guys think in a review! Was it okay?


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